Sunday, January 30, 2005

all calm on the western front

For some reason tonight, I feel very calm and peaceful and happy with where I am at in life, and the pursuit of my happiness. I'm not sure what exactly has changed from the last few entries about my busy busy life and the massive amount of time spent reading for classes and NOT really loving that - (still don't really love all that - but at least I know it's useful and will help me with the career - so it's not like learning how to graph parabalas back in Algebra and Precalc, when all I could think was "Oh, yea, I'm REALLY going to need this in my job later in life" ) But tonight, I'm really just happy. Coposetic even...should i know how to actually SPELL that word...I'd use it properly. True, I still have much headway to make in my life and my self-improvement missions and all of the things I wisht o accomplish - and they linger and float through my head...as does the realization that I've got projects and assignments to do and everything else...but tonight, i guess, they've just really been pushed into that backyard area of my brain rather than running through..um..the kitchen?.. (okay, I realize I SUCK at metaphors and I SUCK even more at metaphors that I've attempted in "on the spot" situations...but I figure the Kitchen is the most likely place for all of my "daily tasks and my more long term projects" to rumminate normally. This is because the kitchen is normally where you start your day, as you eat your cereal or whatever and think over your daily tasks.) It's as if they've all decided to take a holiday though, or at least, want to play in the backyard on the swingset for awhile. Affording me enough time to walk from the kitchen, into the living room, where I do my BEST relaxing. Can I just say now that I am sooo happy I have so many great and wonderful people in my life that I get to converse with often either through phonecalls, emails or actually see! Thank you all for being such wonderful and great mood-altering drugs for me. :) Perhaps i"m also excited to give myself a "dramatic" make over change of some sort that's in the works and to see peoples' reactions - most obviously my OWN. I haven't had short "boycut" hair since i was in Elementry school, and I"m thinking of returning to that look for awhile...could be interesting...Valentine's Day will hopefully be the day for the deal to occur....so I can do something fun and interesting on that day!
other than that, I leave you with Traci's parting words from this evening's study session at Starbucks. "libraries are the diva deal"
Well this week went by pretty fast. I feel sort of as if so much of the semester has already past and that there are soo many things i should have already started relating to school work that i haven't gotten to yet. Oh well, there's only so much you can do each day before you go insane. Grad school has really made me notice my ADD MTV generation attention span. I can't go for more than two hours of reading without having to take a break, and either bounce off the walls for awhile or have some other distraction around. Plus, while reading my mind wanders so much, to thinking about so many other things, it's like i'm trying to tell myself with my consciousness that ANYTHING is more worthwhile than learning and reading whatever is in front of me. So much so, that today, while reading about structures and theories of organizational learning and scapegoats and whistle-blowers for compannies, I was instead recalling an experience from elementry school - ya, that far back, so I really have NO idea what i was trying to read. Damnit, I hate when you end a paragraph and have no idea what it said, but yay for the memory, because it was a sweet one :).
I've had a decent weekend too. I screwed up something at worktoday - at least I think I did, which I'll probably have to try and correct later this week, but only one probably correctable mistake so far isn't horrible I guess. Traci and I investigated a bit of Brown County, we've decided it will be majorly fun to go back there in the Spring time, it reminds me of the Res and the drive out there, but it's actually way cooler, with these gorgeous rolling Southern Indiana hills and trees and these houses that look like quaint little cottages and some log cabins. I could really tell where all the flooding has happened too, since all the trees were basically burried in ice. Seemed a lill desolate, but the warm smoke coming from the cabins made me feel warm too. Nashville is a small sorta spread out town with a wedding chapel, plenty of bed and breakfasts and an artists' colony and a county library. Of course Traci and I went to the library to check that out :) not much was there though....a kewl building nonetheless. We went into a couple of the shops, one where the woman made handmade paper, another for doll house minatures. I thought about the boys back home too, because in one "box" they had a miniature old time bar set up, and I totally thought the boys would LOVE the little mini bottles of Jack Daniels, (for will of course), and beer cans (for Q). We went into a book store as well, but quickly realized we needed to get back to B-town for Traci to get a monroe co public library card, so back we went. I will have to take a picture of the sign for the car place here...it def tops Kum and Go, for the signage and the hilarious dirty-ness of it. Perhaps I will get a chance to do that soon. Friday night I stayed in and did homework, and I watched Charade, an Audrey Hepburn Carry Grant movie with the Stempel Three girls . and then went to bed, I was exhausted, having woken up at 5 am and not being able to get back to sleep. I also felt a little pang of missing home, because not only did I get emails from many of the old friends - including one from heather hall - whom I saw in Germany last summer and sarah buschelman whom I haven't seen since third year at UI, but because many of them were going out on the town last night, and/or drinking together. While I didn't really drink much during the semesters I would still have probably gone and hung out and socialized, so i do miss that aspect...more now than last semester too, because I haven't met anybody else to go to the bars with here in Indy yet. Today has been really boring during the day, homework/reading the whole time...did watch the hawks kick indy ass...no surprise there. I had a great time watching Dial M for Murder with Christa, Dimah and Julie though - classic older movies are great! We went to main and were just purusing the shelves of movies there. I realized I have not seen many of the "classics" I've now resolved to watch all of the movies on the AFI's 100 years 100 movies list that I have not already seen. I've not seen many - and some I've only seen a few scenes from - like Casablanca, and the Godfather (Thanks ALOT jon and Q!!! I will fastforward through that scene next time!!!!) so before the end of summer I will try to see all of them that I haven't. another zealous behind the scene type project...
right now it's 1 am, and I"m not really feeling sleepy, but again, not feeling like doing any more reading tonight. so hence the longer entry in this online journal thang. I'm feeling like writing some poetry, but also not feeling motivated to write it, becaue it would be crappy. Tomorrow will be spent doing homework most of the day, then going to kickboxing in the early evening, then to Barnes and Noble with Traci for more homework time, but at least in a different place. The "e" cover on my keyboard has fallen off of the laptop. This is not good. Not only because it is more difficult to use the "E" key, and my realization that the e is in quite a few words in zee english language, but also because it's not my laptop, it's dad's. I'm sure he will be none too happy to hear this.
I am looking forward to Valentine's Day this year...which is odd. The last time I had a good valentine's day was junior year of college, when I made protest shirts with Christy, Jon gave all the girls roses (so he could be a pimp ya..) and Tuttle wrote me a poem. That was the last good V-day I had. Senior year, I got my teeth cleanned, that was the highlight. 5th year I dogsat for Fritz, the cutest Schnauzer in the world, and had to field phone calls from weird stalkerboy #2 who wanted to come over to keep me company. This year might actually be interesting. I've always been single on V-day, and that will not change this time around - so i get to wear my Pink protest shirt - yes, the ONLY pink shirt I own (since i really dislike the color pink) I will go to class...oh joy....and then I may set up an appointment to dye my hair, something drastic, a big change...any suggestions from the online journal readers out there?
I got my first paycheck yesterday too, makes me feel like less of a slacker, as I've spent all of last semester watching the account balance simply dwindle. I bought a scale and some handweights too...to help motivate myself to lift more often.
and that's the boring life of me. If I were to write a screenplay to the movie of my life so far - (since i'm on a movie kick after the AFI list) I think I would have to title chapters - sort of like in Kill Bill - and this one would be called "The Boring life of Me" subtitled the grad school years, and yes, I know now how to do the proper grammer and punctuation for cataloging such a title.
so, that's the scoop here. ...

Tuesday, January 25, 2005

Just got back from jazz dance class at the HPER. Fun stuff! I like the teacher, and the moves are fun (so far) though I could do without dancing to Britney Spears, - in whatever form it happens to be. Oh well. Guess I'll muddle my way through the moves still and see what happens. I'm starting to feel like these are the only sane moments of my day -when I work out, and I can stop thinking about everything else. It's like I allow myself to concentrate on something else and relax and just enjoy the movement. Otherwise it's usually just my brain that's moving, or rather, racing. It was a good weekend, fun,, saw phantom of the opera (movie) and hung with some gals from my floor...and also lots of reading, surprise surprise. Seems like my life consists mostly of reading. But that's okay. I will accept occasional phone calls from friends to rescue me from that task any time ;) for those of you that read this thing! Now though, i will return to the books...

Saturday, January 15, 2005

1. First Name: Susan
2. Were you named after anyone? Not anyone particular, was going to be named Rachel, but my grandmother couldn't spell it.
3. Do you wish on stars? alot, but like that song says "guess i must be wishing on someone else's star"
4. When did you last cry? once last semester, I don't cry too often
5. Do you like your handwriting? it's somewhat unique, in that's it messy and hard to read- I can write lefthanded and backwards too.
6. What is your favorite lunch meat? turkey slices
7. What is your birth date? August 2, 1981 - I'm soo OLD now heh.
8. What is your most embarrassing CD? My CD's aren't very embarrassing - I do own Paula Abdual on tape though I don't listen to it or play it
9. If you were another person, would YOU be friends with you? I imagine so, I'm friends with my twin, and that is because she is very similar to me in personality. I'd probably think that I'm too hyper and excitable sometimes though.
10. Are you a daredevil? not in most situations
11. Have you ever told a secret you swore not to tell? once it wasn't a secret anymore, and the person said it was okay for me to share it, then yes.
12. Do looks matter? looks as in the looks you get from people, like expressions? or looks like physical composition, cause I'd say the first matters, so you can "read" people better, and the second is very minimal in my book...except for my own self-estem issues, but that's a whole other paragraph...
13. How do you release anger? vent to other people, write, and if i'm totally at my wits end I'll cry,
14. Where is your second home? Okoboji, IA, it's home away from Home. Home being Iowa City, and Bloomington - cause I've taken to calling both "Home"
15. Do you trust others easily? it depends. usually people have to give me a reason not to trust them, but I generally don't trust guys as much, steming from past experiences
16. What was your favorite toy as a child? I used to play with Barbies and model horses quite a bit.
17. What class in high school do you think was totally useless? I was an overachiever so took all 7 periods every year. I'd have to say homeroom was pretty much a waste of my time....
18. Do you have a journal? yup got a couple, a travel one and one that I jot down quotes stories and secrets in. I'm with Cas on this one - thanks freaky twin thang.
19. Do you use sarcasm a lot? probably too often - but I love dark sarcastic comedies
22. What are your nicknames? Sus, Susie-Sunshine, Crackbaby, Stripping Librarian, Oblivious Blond (the newest)
23. Would you bungee jump? sure
24. Do you untie your shoes when you take them off? depends on the pair of shoes
25. Do you think that you are strong? in spirit or physically? cause I'm average on the physical strength, but I think i've got alot of character to make me strong of spirit
26. What is your favorite ice cream flavor? Ben and Jerry's Chubby Hubby - hands down.
28. Shoe Size? 7-8
29. red or pink? red. I look all right in pink, I just don't like the color all that much unless it's with lots of others...
30. What is your least favorite thing about yourself? physically or personality wise? I've got hangups inboth categories. I talk too much, and I don't like my legs.
31. Who do you miss most? That is alive or passed away? Alive would be my friends in other cities, and passed away would be my grandmother and grandfather (separate sides of the family)
32. Do you want everyone you send this to, to send it back? I'm not sending it, i'm posting it, so they can do as they please
33. What color pants and shoes are you wearing ? blue, and socks that say "slowpoke" and have cute little turtles on them. yay turtles!
34. What are you listening to right now? bourne supremacy movie
35. Last thing you ate? a sub sandwich and some mike and ikes.
36. If you were a crayon, what color would you be? periwinkle (partly cause it's almost my last name, and partly cause i love the color of blue)
37. What is the weather like right now? annoying snow
38. Last person you talked to on the phone? faraji aka scandalous
39. The first thing you notice about the opposite sex? eyes and smile (same here cas)
40. Do you like the person who sent this to you? How can I not love the new IC Me?
42. Favorite Drink? Alcoholic: Alabama Slambers or 151 and coke; Non Alc: Diet sprite or rootbeer
43. Favorite Sport? Football and basketball to watch, Soccer, horseback riding and Volley ball to play
44. Hair Color? sort of a golden blond color - though I might dye it soon....
45. Eye Color? blue - though grey-ish in the wintertime
46. Do you wear contacts? no
48. Favorite Food? Italian - I mean REAL Italian too, thin crust legit pizza - as well as americanized Olive Garden etc
49. Last Movie You Watched? well, half paying attention to bourne supremacy - otherwise Kill Bill
50. Favorite Day Of The Year? no idea...whatever day something goes right in my life is a favorite day to me
51. Scary Movies Or Happy Endings? scary movies if i"ve got someone to go with that will make me feel safe afterward, otherwise happy endings
52. Summer Or Winter? I'm a Fall girl at heart - though I'd put Summer way above Winter
53. Hugs OR Kisses? yes please :)
55. What Is Your Favorite Dessert? cherry cheesecake
56. Who Is Most Likely To Respond? no idea.
57. Who Is Least Likely To Respond? no idea.
58. Living Arrangements? single dorm room in a 21 and over dorm.
59. What Books Are You Reading? ack, too many for classes!
60. What's On Your Mouse Pad? it's boring, and my mouse is on it, DUH. (oh ya, that's the sarcasim coming through)
61. What did you watch on TV last night? various background distractions
63. Favorite Smells? Nautica Latitude Longitude, victoria secret halo (what I wear), chocolate chip cookies baking, lilacs
64. Favorite Sounds? laughter,
65. Rolling Stones or Beatles? I listen to both, but more often Beatles
66. Do you believe in Evolution or Creationist?? I think they coexist
67. What's the furthest you've been from home? in the U.S. Hawaii. internationally: Czech Republic

Thursday, January 13, 2005

well i've confirmed that this semester will involve much reading and some serious intellectual challenges. joy. hopefully i'll still have a life outside of the library stacks....

Tuesday, January 11, 2005

The recap catchup

Well, I am back in the swing of things here in indiana. Enjoying the nice 62 degree weather today, though it was rainy, at least it wasn't icy, like back in IC. I hope you've all stayed indoors or gotten home safely over there! The two classes I've had so far will be good I think, both with professors I had last semester, yay for them! I'm more nervous for the seminar in art librarianship which will be on Thursday - because I haven't taken the prereq and it's a class of only 9 people. I already have reading assignments and *gasp* had PRE-reading assignments too...publishing syllabi on the web has it's advantages for the profs, and disadvantages for the students I guess. It's hard to push my brain back into school mode though. I did get over to the SRSC today to work out a bit, which will be a good habit to get into. I'll recap the last few days in IC and here, in order to catch folks up, and close this quickly, because I've got massive reading to do for Thursday...
I spent Thurs night by hanging out a bit w. Jon, who CRUSHED me at NCAA Football on xbox. I thought it rather comical - for someone that usually learns what the buttons do by creating random schemes of pushing all at once or all in a row - that he handed me the MANUAL, I was thinking to myself, what kind of messed up game is this, and I quickly learned that I would do well to memorize that manual. So ya, I'll learn what all those buttons do, and then, Jon, you better look out, cause it'll be GO TIME! After some xbox adventures, we went and picked up Ashley, Kath, and Chai and went to the women's bball game. I LOVE watching basketball - I have a lead on Yogi's as the place to watch the Hawk Men this weekend (bummer that they are 0-2 in the big ten now). After the game, we went back to Jon's, where Chai and I played some Burnout Three, - my FAV xbox game (out of the 4 I've played). Then we headed to pick up folks and go to MugClub. It was quite fun for the most part. I think the people i was with know like every single person that lives in the town of iowa city, cause they were all running into people they knew. Besides my friends, I only ran into one other person that I know myself. It was good times though. Then i went home and crashed! I met with Rijn at 10 am to discuss the internship this summer - I'm hoping to keep myself super busy with working ALOT so as to make ALOT of money - which means, after internship meeting I went out to ACT to interview. I must fill out many other appl. as well, when I"m back in IC - if anybody knows someone looking for summer help...please pass along my name ;) ...Then I joined Misa and Ax for lunch at the hospital, which was fun, and i headed over to Hardin and visited with Hope (my old boss) She's so cool. Couldn't talk for long though - cause i met pete at house of aromas for coffee (or in my case, Orange tea) that was a great convo :) I was happy he wanted to go. I also met Jaime for dinner at the mall, and that was fun to. wedding plans seem to be coming along nicely. After that, Misa and I headed up to CR for the girls night! Sorry to my boys out there, I love you guys, - but sometimes, the gals just need a night to have some fun with their own kind :)....we had a total blast! It was a group of about 10 of us, including some of hte Mt. Mercy girls that i haven't seen in Ages! We went to a new place called "element".
My one funny story from the night, just proves that I will always remain the oblivious "blond". When Misa and I walked in, I was wearing a zip-up sweatshirt over my "goingout" tank top. For thoseo f you that don't know I have a set of "goingout" tanks, which, to various degrees are mostly designated as such because I can get them smoky and wash them easily. Well, as I paid to get in, the bouncer told me to unzip my sweatshirt top, - no worries, I thought, this is probably just to check for concealed weapons or something. Well, after, rezipping my sweatshirt back up, the bouncer informs me that I will need to check my sweatshirt. I was thinking, "huh? what? that makes no sense" and I think he saw the look on my face conveying my thoughts. He responded by saying the coat check was free. I nodded, paid and walked in. It was FREEZING in the bar, so there was NO WAY I was going to check my shirt! I asked Misa, who was wearing a zip-up fleace over her tanktop "Did he tell you to check that?" and she gave me this weird look. "No, why?" "Because he told me to check mine. Which is soo stupid, it's way to cold in here. jeesh" and misa gave me another look, that clearly conveyed I'd been the "oblivious blond" as usual...the bouncer was totally interested in seeing me wearing my tanktop all night, instead of my zip-up sweatshirt. In other words, he'd been trying to hit on me. *shakes head* In the end, it's more annoying than endearing for bouncers to hit on you when you walk into a bar, but, in my case, I guess I won't notice anyway.
The rest of the night went really well, lots of fun dancing, and the drive home was nice, because misa and I got to catch up. I left IC early on Sat morning, and drove back to B-town, which just a lill bit of snow and icky weather right outside Indianapolis, so no big. Settled back in, and did dinner and a movie with Traci...yay! She's such a good cook, and a regular martha stewart without the jail time. :) We watched Eternal Sunshine. Sunday I lounged around and got my textbooks and finished unloading. So that's it...it's back to the exciting life of a grad student. - I am looking forward to starting work on Friday though. Art Libraries RAWK!
hope you are all well!

Wednesday, January 05, 2005

Loyalties and Parties

All day today my away message varied from "I hate snow" "I despise snow" "Snow sucks" and "When I'm grown up, I want to live somewhere warm" mostly this is due to my cabin fever of sorts, because I was stuck inside the house for the ENTIRE day. Blah. There was this huge storm that's moved through Iowa (will not be done until tomorrow afternoon) and it started with sleet and ice, and now is snowing. So the grounds are not only icy, but snowy to. Just the kind of weather I really LOVE being around. *ahem* cough, sarcasm. I also hate when the weather means my plans get cancelled. Just proves Mother Nature really does rule our lives, and rightly so - as we've recently seen how powerful it can be, and sadly at that. But tonight we were going to make ghetto gingerbread houses, and it was going to be fun, I just know it. We did it a few years ago and I thought it was a blast. I like being creative, and I especially like when I can be creative at the same time as other people and we can share the creative vibes. OH well, only a few more days in Iowa, until back in Indy I will not have time to do anything but study, attend classes, study, read for classes, hopefully work out occasionally, figure out housing for next year, and maybe do dinner a few times with some friends. That will suck...means to an end, means to an end. I'll just keep telling myself that. I meet with my internship advisor in the morning (if I can get OUT and drive on the roads) I hope that she doesn't think I'm a total moron, and that I have no business being an art librarian. I'm worried she'll think I'm not ready for it...
This past weekend was a total blast. I haven't been out to party that consistantly in FOREVER. Firstly we went out for Eben's bday on Thurs night, fun times. At least my hair looked really spiff and cute. Was a small West high Reunion, and Jana and Pete got to come along as well. Then on Friday night we did the new year's styles. All the pics are up on the web. it was a blast...I love those folks, thanks for celebrating with me you guys! Sat I was on full recovery mode. I did almost nothing the whole day. I fell asleep at like 10:30 that night too. Sunday night we went to Jakes for Kimi's 21st. That was also quite fun, took me back a ways to last year and many years previous when we'd go there to dance and have a good time just grooving the night away. Jakes is also the bar that is somewhat known as the "hook up" bar, though Sunday night, during break, there weren't too many ppl out. We did have a few guys that danced with kimi and me for a bit, but mostly it was just the group on the floor. Then Monday night we went to the Field House to help her celebrate with Pitchers, I drove though, and was bummed that they didn't have the dance floor open that night, but it was okay, it was a very relaxed and chill evening to help Kimi reach official legal age. Tonight I've stayed in, due to the weather...tomorrow night, I'll watch the hawk men open their big ten season. I am definately a hawkeye at heart, having spent 22 years of my life cheering on my black and gold. - so when I'm in Indy I will have to find a sportsbar that'll show the bball games so I can stay on top of things, and go IU basketball too - I watched the IU women take on the UI women the other night, and had my Iowa sweatshirt on, especially because I went with my mom, and she's also a UI grad. I cheered for the IU girls when they made good plays, but ultimately, I find my loyalty sports wise must rest with the hawks still - not to mention that after the hailmary pass to end the Capital One Bowl, I'm pretty impressed with how lucky my Hawk football team was, with the end of their season. Only 3 more days in Iowa...hopefully the weather will be good for the drive back on Sat. night folks.

Monday, January 03, 2005

well, the vacation is winding down. This morning I awoke to a sheet of ice not only covering my car, but the sidewalks, streets, and anything else in this town. Welcome to Winter weather. Blah. I totally need to move somewhere warm most of the year. This weekend has been a rather crazy display of partying and fun. Last night we went out to celebrate Kimi's 21st, and tonight we'll do it again with pitchers, though I'll drive tonight. Before that was new years eve, which was quite the crazy display to watch as well. Before that, Eben's 24th at the piano lounge, which was a fun time to. Vacation is on the wann, I need to get myself back into the habbit of getting up at a decent hour, rather than sleeping in, which i've finally grown accustomed to. It will be weird to return to Indy and have to put my nose to the grindstone again, especially with 4 actual grad school classes and a part time job - I imagine I'll be quite busy, but I do tend to think I opperate well under busy conditions. I felt like a slacker last semester without having a job, so at least that will make me feel some what more worthwhile and like I"m contributing more to paying for my higher higher education still. I've enjoyed my time here, primarily, and will miss the IC friends when I head back for school. I am eager to return though, so I can get another semester underway and then finished. I'm also eager to return to Indy to get some things figured out, but until then I'm all about just having a good time and enjoying the company of other folks!
hope you all had safe and happy new years!